5 Tips for Dating Someone with Depression

5 Tips for Dating Someone with Depression

September 2021

Welcome to the topic “5 Tips for Dating Someone with Depression.”

Depression can be a taboo topic in some social circles, but it doesn’t change the fact that it’s real like any other illness. Furthermore, dating someone who struggles with depression can be complicated due to the difficulty of figuring out the right words to say and the right things to do. Your relationship may involve unique challenges, but it’s essential to accept your partner as they are.


Remember that their depression doesn’t define them, so it’s better to focus on their other personality traits. Lastly, it can be painful to watch someone you care about suffer from distress, and it’s normal to feel the need to help. However, showing support through empathy and love can prove better than trying to “treat” their mental illness.

Here are 5 tips for dating someone who is challenged by depression:

1.  Learn More About Depression and its Symptoms

It’s essential to accurately understand the reality of depression and how it affects your partner. You need to know that it’s more than just mood fluctuations, and the experience can vary from person to person. Thus, do your research and expand your knowledge about it. This is because educating yourself about your partner’s illness and symptoms is vital in case there is a major shift in their health. Moreover, try to offer validation instead of advice when they share their thoughts.

2.  Stay Flexible and Patient

Depression is a disorder that can make it difficult for people to participate in everyday activities. It’s normal for your partner’s mood to change unpredictably even if you made plans of going out. It’s understandable if you feel disappointed or hurt but remind yourself that they’re experiencing a psychological illness that compromises their ability to function normally. Therefore, the key is to stay flexible and be respectful of their needs without taking them personally.

3.  Practice Effective Communication

Once you’ve gained the trust of your partner through your care and affection, they’d be more willing to share the difficulties they experience. Thus, you should establish a method or language for having more open conversations so that your partner feels heard and validated. Additionally, giving the appropriate responses can make a huge difference in making them feel comfortable expressing their thoughts and emotions.

4.  Don’t Try to “Fix” Your Partner

It can be difficult watching someone you love and care about in pain, and your first instinct would be to help them or “fix” their situation. However, you need to know that depression can’t be “cured” overnight. Similarly, it also can’t be fixed by suggestions and advice. Thus, the way you offer help and intervene can make an impact. It’s better to ask your partner how you could support them, learn their triggers and coping mechanisms. More importantly, just be there for them.

5.  Take out Time for Yourself

When you’re with someone battling a mental illness, your own negative emotions like sadness, anger, or hurt might feel less important or insignificant compared to what your partner has to deal with. However, looking after your own needs and wants is even more essential if you’re going to offer help and support. Thus, acknowledge your feelings and make sure you have a support system to express yourself.

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