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Going on a date can sometimes bring about the weirdest of your emotions and you are left to be all confused and jumbled up. Chatting online to meeting in face to face with someone is totally different and a completely different way of interaction with people, you never know what you may come across, you may not even recognize people due to the difference in appearance of people from dating sites.
The mere thought of going on a date with the person of your interest can be overwhelming and stressful for the most of us. Whether it be the build-up of tension between both sides or one’s personal anxiousness, without mental preparation and tension relievers, you may not have a great time on your very first date, brushing a bad impression on your date. But with the help of our 12 tips under your belt you may hit the jackpot and leave your partner thinking about you and craving for your attention.
In the heat of the moment, everything gets intensified such as self judgement and self-consciousness ,In these very moments you should focus on your strengths which can be your appearance or your ability to handle conversations very well. Stay calm and confident and don’t sweat it, try to focus on the fact that you are going on a date with the person you’ve been interested in for a while. And keeping that in mind set a friendly and refreshing smile throughout the day, smiling gives a warm welcoming feel to people, they’ll be more likely to interact with you and hold up fun conversations and treat this date as a time to relax with you.
As the saying goes ‘Manners make Man’. You should follow this and the last thing that your date would expect is for you to arrive late, this not only creates nervousness but diverts the mind from the date, try to manage your time according with that date so you wouldn’t be in a hurry, being late would give the impression of you not prioritizing the date which would be extremely unattractive and a major turn off . Reaching the place before time should be your top priority and even if you arrive late, do inform before-hand. This way they can also delay their arriving time and don’t have to wait alone for prolonged time. Small things like these can go a long way and show that you are extremely considerate about your time and likewise of the other person’s time too!
Being on a first date can be intense and sometimes space demanding, for this very reason pick a spot that is less crowded and can be a soothing environment to have a chat. The pressure of a fancy restaurant sometimes may be too much to handle at once on the first date or meeting in a noisy environment such as a fast food restaurant or a shopping mall. These places are definitely not the ideal place to meet someone and have a chat with them for the first time. Making them feel secure and comfortable should be your first priority and concern, if they usually avoid crowds, you should pick a quieter place with less people so they can be in their bubble throughout the entire date and don’t get fed up with the place’s atmosphere. Also, this way you can have a better chat while being isolated from distractions of neighboring people and traffic or even city noise.
Nothing screams chemistry like binging on delicious food and having laughs together. Make sure to eat foods that both of you like and have meaningful conversations ,this is going to release hormones from your brain that will bring positive and happy vibes and will leave a friendly mark on your date, surely having such a pleasant time with someone brings feelings of frankness and closeness with one another, this is great in the beginning of a relationship as it sets the tone of the entire bond with the other person and can very be the memories that you both will remember.
The last thing that you should do is open up about yourself in a private manner or indulge in heartfelt conversations that strike the mood of the date. A first date is not the ideal place to talk about hearty topics, may it be your tough relationship with your family or your quarrel with your boss last week. Conversations like these dull the settings of a date and should be avoided at all costs. You should be talking about positive topics and your accomplishments and the happy highlights of your entire life, This invites the other person to share their amazing moments as well which is an indication of trust of companionship along with getting familiar with each other.
Both Men and Women appreciate compliments that are real and when they are told by being true to oneself. That being said don’t hold yourself off and be vocal about what you see in the other person, this exudes confidence and boldness, a thing that is not commonly found in people, this can be really attractive to the other person and you may win their heart if it’s your lucky day, complimenting their eyes or their smile ,this shows that you are detail orientated and have a keen eye in appreciating beauty of the other person, all in all compliments shouldn’t be held back and should be a great gesture.
On a date, both parties should equally participate in the conversation, even if you’re being enthusiastic, you should let the other person speak as well. Likewise, they should also get to speak and for you to listen to them actively ,active listening is a great habit that shows commitment and mindfulness in a meeting , that being said you should also avoid peaking and looking at your mobile phone, it’s not fun to talk to someone whose frequently checking their phone, it makes the speaker feel unheard which should be the last thing felt in a date by anyone and is a major turn-off for most of the people, participate in the conversation and don’t let it be one sided at any given time.
A means of communication that should always be noted but is often ignored is body language, body language can never lie and with the right detection ,you can flip the situation of a date comfortably. Anything from a slight touch of intimacy to the slightest of the discomfort in the eyes or constant fidgeting can tell a lot about someone’s interest in a date, this should never be ignored as this can be the make or break of a date to go well or not, if someone is nodding and humming to your conversation, you should ask open ended questions to let them speak or join in on the conversation, seeing them face their legs towards you and look you in the eyes and mirror your actions, this is a strong indication to the point that they are completely digging you and like sitting with you having a conversation, intimacy between a meeting should also not be ignored as it’s a crystal clear message from the person that they like you and would definitely be looking forward to a second date and many more after that, lucky you !
While everything can go great, personal chemistry and compatibility are extremely important from a dating aspect, dating can be different from many relationships, including friendships, as this is a big decision to share a life with someone , So it wouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that they want to fill every box in the list. So don’t be intimidated by controversial topics and chat about one’s religion, political beliefs, ideal relationship goals, starting of a family and their future plans and see if they align with you and your standards and beliefs, this may be the deal breaker for many of the people but is a vital step coming into a relationship and you should never shy away from this conversation at all, this just shows that you are mature and grown up coming into a relationship also thinking about the realistic aspects of the relationship, also comes to show people’s personalities and their way of thinking which further indulges deeper meaningful conversations that are very easy to be held and all in all you get to know familiarize yourself with your dating partner.
Think of it as a fun interaction between a random person instead of an interview with them. While Talking loads and chatting with the other person getting to know them, brush the tension off and lay back and relax and breathe into the date ,you don’t want yourself tensed up and intimidated throughout the entire date, you will feel heavy and tense all along and you won’t really be enjoying the date as a whole, you can maybe go for a walk shortly after having food or do a fun activity together to release the heat and built up tension, doing this can ease both of the people into not trying to get to know each other and remember the purpose of the meeting which is to have a good time all along, some fun activities include bowling, going to an amusement park together or taking the city bus taking rounds of the beautiful city. Heck! You guys may even get to crack jokes or chase each other, modern world romantics eh!
While every romantic movie has fed us the concept of looking at someone and basically eternally falling in love, that usually isn’t the case frankly and just a myth. Like everything, good things take time and relationships are no easy, they are extremely complex and getting along isn’t going to be relatively easy, so brush it off and keep trying because love is challenging but has a great reward of finding a gem of a person to spend your precious life together with, stay focused on the purpose of having fun, enjoying life day by day with this great person while also not forgetting the part where you both will be sharing each other’s life, so don’t hesitate in letting them come into your bubble of life, it’s natural and it only shows the commitment from both sides and an indication of a great relationship that everyone wants to have, first sight impression can only last a while, slowly falling for the other person is just the right way to go about it, so don’t sweat it going too fast and rushing the entire relationship just for sake of losing curiousness and anxiousness, you’re not obliged to pace up the relationship.
The question everyone asks after a date is that was it good enough to the other person’s standards or not, you can always be unsure about this but there are many ways to answer this, from their experience to the way you felt throughout your time together with them. If you felt good about it and you’re already thinking about the next time that you guys meet, this alone shows that you had a fantastic time with the other person and you bonded well with your potential significant other, also the signing off also depicts how the other person feels, did they feel uncomfortable at all saying goodbye? Or was there any sort of intimacy involved between both of you while saying goodbye? If so then you may have done everything right in your control and now it solely may be up to the other person to express their thoughts and feelings regarding your meeting with them.
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Also Read: Dating Advice: What Makes a Successful First Date?